The Magic Is In The Breath.

     There have been various references to "going and joining the circus" in the course of my adult life--light mentions while thoughts lingered on my Spirit-guided nature (Others have called it "gypsy," to which I say, "Whatever.") to someone I spent some time with, who was drawn to me my 1st year out of college, after my spiritual awakening, who had dated someone who had played volleyball for UIC and had gone Cirque Du Soleil.  He drew connections, prodded me with details to check 4 interest, then all-out said that he could see me doing the same.  I sensed it was a compliment but, at the time, thought it was one of the most off-kilter combos of my traits I had heard of.  Def., I was differently organized at the time, and far less self-aware and Self-Master.
     Acrobatics and Acro-ish influences swung in and out of my journey into Santa Monica Power Yoga Teacher Training, into establishing myself as a "real" yogi trying to plant and spread the seed, the Consciousness, the rewards in Kansas City.
     Chinese acrobatic performers catching my chi and attention by landing in about every city I have, signs cropping up at the few places I frequent with frequency.
     Amidst the community full of watchers to my daily yoga practice in the "studio" part of the state-of-the-art "Fitness Center" at the apartment community in Phoenix, where I was both taking refuge and taking a stand, a living sage and a yogi and little else, there was one former Las Vegan, also demolished by the Recession & its aftermath, who literally stared with his mouth open and his eyes glittering (Hi, _______.  I hope those Victoria's Secret Angels R smiling pretty for you).  He rushed me after my practice with his young daughter, with many questions, "I haven't seen anything like that since Cirque Du Soleil!!!  That was amazing!!!"  Thank you.
     The magic is in the Breath.
     Yesterday, I finally rented "Cirque Du Soleil: Worlds Away," since I did not get to see it in the theaters, as my interest had been interested in doing.  What helped me decide is, last night, the thought of not hearing words soothed my being.
     The freedom in the bodies, the purity and/or beauty that I saw, was nothing less than Bliss-created.  Bliss in expression.  There was Satya in it.  And yet, when it boiled right down to it, I thought that maybe if any of these beings did go into the Light, perhaps their lives were not given for saying so or explaining it.  Just to do, and to show, and to love and pass from this Earth as that.  It was not my mission.  Right now.  Perhaps it is already written in our breastplate--of what we R made and in what way we will serve this universe.  What gifts and how.
     Would any of us know God, systematically especially, if there were not prophets, messengers, and Teachers who spoke bravely, wrote the books, the texts, the manuscripts--the writing on the wall, so to speak, and literally?
     Perhaps many of us now can just watch the Light spectacular in color and effort, glistening, radiating purely out of a being literally set afire, spinning like Rumi in his Zero Circle, but originally, as energy, as vibration, with creativity and feeling and compassion burning a hole, almost, thru his or her heart, as passion, rage, love beyond I.D., terrifying sadness that covers the planet and spills over into the universe, realizing that Love is still the choice as it gives to the maximum capacity it can give while screaming, crying, climaxing, and flying, all at the same time.
     In that One breath.
     It is all there.
     That, for me, in my experience, is Yoga.
     In that reality, Source is.
     I am nothing else.

New Addition!: Designworks Salon, Wellness Spa, & Retail Center (Dubuque, IA)--From the E-Update Flow

Eenie Meenie Mynie Moe...Catch a Bigot By The Toe.

If She Hollars, Let Her Go,

Cuz There's Due Karma Down The Road.

True Story: Despite so-so intuitions, at best, about them in the past, from both a possible employment and tapas (yogic lifestyle) perspective, I decided to give Designworks Salon, Wellness Spa, and Retail Center a try upon landing in Dubuque last year, when I finally was in any sort of position to do so, following a New Client discount given 2 me by Sarah-Mom.

Over the past several months, I've touched base with them and the 1 or 2 other places in town involved in "green" Beauty, in the back of my mind due to my interests with Love Yoga: The Movement, in part just because it's an area of interest and, obviously, everyone needs to get their hair cut (Though I have tossed around the idea of shaving my head several times, and today would be a perfect reason to do just that in protest).

My 1st visit created for me a "New Customer Card," during which point I had a certain amount of months to use really rockin' discounts on a smattering of Services available at Designworks.

I ended up using all 4 of 5, though I admit I did a couple of them just to be nice. They were nice, seemed to enjoy my energy in the place, and some of the service providers were (seriously) considering coming to class.

Not the last visit, but the one before, I was checking out, and I was debating on the gratuity due to the fact that it was not a good job, not a great brand of product, further confused by the well-meaning Receptionist who ended up consulting me on my math (which was actually correct, at some point), resulting in a lower tip than I'd intended.

I went home, fixed my file job, and noticed major chips already the next day in my manicure, that I normally do myself (self-explanatory).

Anyway, when I got my bank statement, the amount from the confusing check-out actually was higher than it was supposed to be. I e-mailed them immediately, stating I didn't want to assume they'd fraudulently try to take extra gratuity, but here's the amount I thought it was--Plz reply.

A slew of e-mails said that they were really sorry for the inconvenience, that they were aware there was some confusion at the register. They eventually said they'd talk to leadership, and finally, that they'd just refund the 50 cents.

Uh, yeah. What in the world. Whatever had happened, all the way up until this point, I didn't even care anymore. I just wanted the bill settled without them trying to tell me what the tip was.

Today, I received a voice message from the 2 owners--Lori and Penny--who I'd been told wanted to make sure that "everything was o-kay" and to ensure that customer satisfaction whatever's were in place. Instead, Penny says something along the lines of, "We think that there's something strange going on...and we think U need to go somewhere else."

My mouth dropped, but the American Wall of Shame was right there, with all its other disgusting inhabitants still existing, operating as if they weren't harmful to us all, "Wait a minute. What did I do wrong? All I did was raise a flag about a mischarge on my statement, and now you're saying that if I called to schedule a service there, I wouldn't be allowed to? That I'm not WELCOME there?!"

That's exactly what she said. In the insane calm I've heard multiple times now from women of her demographic all across the country, she said, "You have a good day now. You have a good day."

I called the police for direction when I couldn't find the Better Business Bureau's number. They gave me the Human Rights Department number, "Yeah," I thought, not even wanting to think what I could've naturally thought given my past interactions with them. My short convo with Carol(e) Espinoso?a? was the same as usual. I explained the situation & said, "I think I've been banned from Designworks for questioning what amounted to 50 cents on 1 transaction." "Well, yes," she said (Sounded so much like the Mad Hatter in "Alice in Wonderland"), "She can definitely tell you to not come back for that."

I laughed thinking about the Human Relations Specialist for the city I'd thought about throwing my application in the ring for the past day or so. And make THEM the boss of my wisdom or intelligence--I DON'T THINK SO!!!

On the ironic side, I now hear that people pushing for 10-20% off their bills and free meals, bullying the employees, at TAIKO Japanese Steakhouse & Sushi Bar, has reached a noticeable high. But Dubuque's not still one of the silliest, most backwards places ever--which is why I said to Carol(e) Espinoso?a?, "Oh really? You don't think it has anything to do with race.  I highly doubt they'd do that to my WHITE MOTHER."

It never stops. Maybe society, including the Human Rights Department, will stand behind a racist restaurant that kicks me out for life because I choose orange juice instead of coffee

Let me reiterate: Scandal, corruption, &/or everyday sin/ignorance, not looking to head elsewhere anytime soon.

These R the places that do this kind of violence to my energy or their relationship to me.

Just warning U.

*Image of Amy Jin with rockin' purple hair in Phoenix, Arizona (2011)*

*Image of Amy Jin in Supta Virasana on pavement (Phoenix, Arizona-2011)*
"I ask that life stop being a cliche...so that I no longer feel as if I have to go away to a mountain in order to experience a context--any context--that is real besides the ones I, alone, create."
-Amy Jin
Love Yoga: The Movement
www.WhatItIsPowerYoga.blogspot.com
Dubuque, Iowa
Temp.-563.556.3524

*To be removed from the Love Yoga: The Movement Database, simply respond to this e-mail and say that. This Database is reserved for Love Yoga: The Movement Love Offerers/donors, paid healing/Spiritual Illumination clients, V.I.P. colleagues, my connections in related industries, regular practitioners of the work itself, and others in the moment becuz I say so.*

Confirmation From Source: On United States of American Business Needing New Leadership

     Not this past Saturday, but I believe the Saturday before, I was stopped by one of my favorite childhood baby-sitter's fathers.  She grew up on the street over from mine and was known for being an upstanding person.  Her mother was the chief administrator for the little suburb of Dubuque that I grew up in who later solicited my attention, if I remember correctly, to design and direct the youth volleyball program for the city park, I believe toward the end of my high school career and into my time at DePaul.  At the time, she (the mother) seemed like the President of our little town.  During the end of my time program-directing and coaching, I agreed to help out in the office--my first experience as a "real" city employee.
     When I found out about the gig at McGraw-Hill (See the account below), and before I knew I'd take my resume straight to the training staff, I thought in the back of my mind, "If I start getting the run-around here, I'll call (so-n-so--my old baby-sitter) and ask her to raise me up to where I'm supposed 2 be."  She'd worked for the company for a long time after teaching in the Chicagoland area and, I'd always heard, had had a highly successful and happy career.
     Her father has seen me around the YM/YWCA and took some interest in my class a Saturday or two before he stopped me more recently, as mentioned.  He said something like, "Did your hear what happened to (my old baby-sitter)?"  "No," I said.  He detailed how (sounded like recently) she was called up one day and was terminated over the phone, after 9? years at the company.  Over the phone.  See ya!
     I told him I was bullied out of a ground-level job I was overqualified for, here in Dubuque--par for the course, in my experience, I said.  That seemed to throw him for a loop and add a new dimension to what he was telling me.
     I think she went to the University of Chicago, not DePaul, which is the only reason I can think of why she might've gotten a cleaner and more high-quality boot than I did.  (Sigh) Back in the day, I had reservations about being an Asian dork by shooting for Ivy League.
     Oh well.  Here I am, for the time being, raising up conscious and awakening human beings like they're my own kids.  It's a totally extraterrestrial experience that keeps me centered in a Love state.  Hot.
     Wheee!

City of Dubuque(, Iowa) Parking Services Icing

     Today, I found out they tried sending another ticket to Sam-Dad Schmelzer, stating that the GET OFF ME!!!, fraudulent, enjoy-stealing-from-the-already-100x-violated-and-at-Christmas-time-U-worthless-pieces-of-human-garbage parking ticket I already paid--like immediately--with my Medical/Dental out-of-pocket money--was still unpaid.  Thx, Parking Services & illegitimate Authority.  I already rested my case.

Hmmm...

     So as soon as I write that, the prices take off like a bat out of hell & now R sitting not-so-pretty at $3.39/gallon.

Make Every Day Earth Day: On Falling Gas Prices

     I've been manifesting this for years and am happy with a punctuation mark every time I round some corner and see gas prices falling, falling, falling down--down to $2.99/gal. today.  I envision 98, 99 cents/gal., like back in the day, when I was a kid.
     We can do it, Iowa.
     It's somewhat too late to get ahead of the game, since 2012 was the hottest year in Earth's history, which just came out in the press, undeniably due to global warming, so stand up for making the choice to honor the Earth while U're here, trading in 4 a hybrid, learning to ride, using your feet.  Riding together.  Place yourself in a better location so that you completely diminish your driving time.
     An enlightened society would place biology first.  The Earth's and our own.  This is a huge element of the tapas of an modern, United States of American yogi/ni, from my teaching/leadership/perspective.

*+Tally Marks: E-Update From Amy Jin & Love Yoga: The Movement--SU/1.30.2013*

With editing...From the E-Update stream:

The End of the World at TAIKO Japanese Steakhouse & Sushi Bar

     Some of you R aware of the scattered external existence I've maintained trying to lead this Power Yoga Movement, not excluding the time here in Dubuque/Iowa all of 2012.
     Some of you R aware that I finally left TJS&SB at the tail end of October after a major sexual harrassment incident with one of the leaders, after which he did everything except weep at my feet to not sue him.  So I chose not to, even though Spirit said I should.
     But when all you see in some of these places is drama, get your pure energy pulled into that drama, have it used to amplify & add color splashes to all the drab and ugly ick that fuels other people's lives, it's not far from saying U'd rather not than be "helped" by these places, if helped at all.
     After one too many power trips by Eddie Hwang & Rose Chuang, the husband and wife team who own it, especially when so many patrons, as usual, assumed I was the owner--or at the very least 1 of their kids--and going Urdhva Dhanurasana for them whenever possible, only to have my schedule slashed for shady reasons, I told her by phone to go screw herself, basically, when she told me, "Not on the schedule next week! Call next week!"--("Wow, I'm really quitting.")  There was no hesitation when I said, "I don't think I'll be back."
     I accidentally called there once, months later, and Eddie answered the phone.  I thought he was going to cry, "It's good to hear your voice."
     Apparently.  Because the week after I left, the cops busted in there & arrested the dishwasher--a woman.  And either before or after that, the rockstar chef who has a violent, stalker girlfriend/wifey, was arrested for some kind of assault on her, which was probably self-defense, being that she also used to work at TJS&SB & was thrown out of there for ranting and raving about something, which continued down the road when the chef started sleeping with everyone else, including stalking people in the parking lot during business hours, slapping one of the waitresses at a bar downtown when she saw her with aforementioned dude, & threatening to kill her.  In between rumored drug deals.  Classy.  And classic for where I've found myself trying to find my imaginary mountain to climb back up on.
     Well, after I walked, I guess everybody quit.  Like everybody.  But the place has a high rate of returning quit/fired employees, so who knows?  I guess everyone misses the wild stripper stories from half the wait staff who migrated over after East Dubuque shut down or watching everyone else have a screaming match with Eddie or Rose and then quit because of one of them--likely Rose.
     You know, during Power Yoga Teacher Training, Bryan shared with us that he bussed tables when he first started teaching in L.A.  I don't know if he went to college, but I do know that he was a rising star at YogaWorks before, reliable WOM has it that he didn't get along with leadership at YogaWorks or had his own way of wanting to do things (There might be 1 or more other well-known yogis of his generation who actually had the same experience there).  Enter Optimal Enchantment/Randall Cooley and Bryan's interesting cast of characters who helped him have and maintain the space now known as Santa Monica Power Yoga East, where 130+ people (still?) line up on Santa Monica Blvd. to do any one of Bryan's classes on Love Offering basis, dropping their money in an ornate wooden box before they leave.
     Even though that track has opened to help me, as well, unfortunately, it's during these head-shaking times where restaurants all over the country have bombed, and continue to bomb.  Not only has the "finding my own corporate job back to back myself" idea not worked at all thus far, but the supplementary income track hasn't been working for me for a while.  In fact, when I was living down in Phoenix, & after I returned to IA, joking had turned to half seriousness when I said, "I think I need a bodyguard."  After yesterday, the consummate anti-gun leader spent most of today wondering if investing in a piece wouldn't be a good idea.
     So fast forward to mid-December--just a mo. ago.  Rose's son, who helps run the restaurant when he's back on break from U of IA, freaked! when he found out not only that I quit but also that, mass exodus-style, kind of like my first job out of college in IT, so did everyone else--and I mean everyone.  So he begged, and I set certain expectations in a short-term agreement to return to help over the holidays FOR HIM.  After all, Rose had left for Taiwan (It wasn't clear if it was spontaneous because everyone hated her or planned) again, & he & I had a pretty solid way of teaming up to run things smoothly as silk, when allowed.
     Helping over the holidays turned into being seduced into helping beyond the holidays, so I reached a crucial juncture where I was looking at, "Hmm. Am I 'going back' to this, or should I draw a line?"  Some cool people I liked working with had all come back, too, so I played it one week at a time and was offered whatever nights I wanted next week.  I was supposed to say what I wanted yesterday.
     Instead, Eddie (as the kid at Kwik Stop in Key West said best) went "PSYCHO" on me.  I could spill a lot of people's desires at that restaurant out on the street, but instead, I'll say that it was a power trip.  At least getting reamed this time wasn't about something he was flat out WRONG about, like usual, after which he doesn't even apologize, and had increased in frequency before I quit the first time as I became more comfortable and carrying authority not only as the in-house yogini but as the overqualified Front of House Manager/possibly something more, being taken advantage of as a Hostess.
     I mean, there were 2 tables left before we had a closed book--one for 10, one for 8.  I set up the last 2 reservation tables of 7 & 8 at those two tables, respectively, and after he had taken the risk earlier of power tripping (again) by telling me to put all reservations at separate tables, instead of together, as usual--to which I questioned it but just did it, even though I thought it was risky, he has the gall to come out and SCREAM at me, "Why did you put the 8 at B1 and...[the other party at the larger table]"  "What? It's totally arbitrary. They're the last 2 reservations, & now we're full, as planned--It's 1 person difference. It doesn't even matter."  SCREAMING!!!  Slammed his fist down 2 inches away from my body on the Hostess stand, while I stood there in heels, staring into his soul.  Grabs the phone violently out of my hand--hurts my hand as he does so--"GET OUT!!!  GET OUT!!!!!!"
     You know, it was rumored that I was a "favorite" of the restaurant's--leadership included.  And so, I couldn't help but smile, for some reason, after he stormed away, even though I'd just been attacked for absolutely no reason.
     Maybe it's that I was told by the bartender's girlfriend last weekend that all the guys at the restaurant "want to marry" me.
     Maybe it's because there was clear speculation that the son back from Iowa liked me and, suddenly, I wasn't there because of my connection with Eddie but my bond with his somewhat contentious stepson.
     I thought about leaving after I'd grabbed my things in utter disbelief, but instead, I Kali-style'd back in, rounded the whole restaurant, before finding him standing like a Chinese soldier in the main dining room.  I grabbed his arm, looked him in the eyes and said, "If you EVER come at me like that again, I will call the police."  He yells, in front of his whole, full dining room which, ironically, happens on nights when I'm working, "Go ahead!  They're waiting for you!"  "No, they're waiting 4 U, Eddie," I yelled back.
     So I went over to Kwik Stop where 2 kind of squirrely guys, possibly in a mildly disrespectful way, were working in a pretty empty store (This was a little after 6P) and told them what happened and called the cops.
     We had to call Dispatch 45 min. later? to make sure they didn't get lost.  I told the now compassionate, cool Stephen guy who offered me a drink on them & had asked for the whole story, that I hoped this wasn't the Dubuque Police Department's way of expressing their priority on violence against women in professional environments.  A stream of conversation about my life, my travels, Power Yoga, places in the country he'd like to see (He had never really been outside of Iowa except to go to Chicago once!), my torture in overqualification, etc., which turned into him trying to recruit me to work for Kwik Stop!  I laughed, "I don't know.  I don't think I can do this anymore.  I've seen this [meaning the Eddie situation] way more than I can say, and I can't do it anymore."  He was totally encouraging, so I promised I'd touch base with his GM & ask about Marketing or what they had available, but, if nothing else, tell her that Stephen was a rockstar.  "You even say my name right," he said excitedly, "No one says my name right!"
     The cop shows up an hour later? I become acutely aware of how freaked out I've been about almost everything bad that's happened to me in the past several years but that I've never been "home" when it's happened, nor had I ever been as perfectly aware how literally no one cared.  Not a single person.  Other than caring strangers.
     I remembered angrily how some of my closest friends and family members yelled out, possessed by the Devil, via E-MAIL--when they hadn't seen or touched base with me for years--how I'd made it up!!!?!??? and when that proved itself completely asenine, that I DESERVED IT--my former best friend/teammate/roommate from DePaul going so far as to use the Law of Magnetism--something I illuminated for her and her husband--a partnership I encouraged into being! to tell me off!!!?? about racial discrimination, bullying, and wrongful termination (in multiple, strung-together incidents).  Insane.  Like Newtown, the gang rape victim over in India, and both of them when they also lost their corporate jobs in Peoria, IL at Caterpillar, not too long after I left mine.  They deserved it.  Not only did they deserve it--they CREATED IT.
     That's about the time any normal person starts softening to the idea of purchasing multiple guns.
     The cop was actually awesome, albeit ridiculously late.  He said he would go over & "have a talk with Eddie" since, technically, I could have him arrested for what's called "simple assault."  That means the person doesn't even have to touch you, just get violent in your direction/personal space.  "Disorderly conduct" at the very least, he said.  That would've been helpful when Sarah-Mom, the lady who raised me, actually did attack me when I came back under similar circumstances in 2010, but that time, when I called the cops here in Asbury, one of the responders was Harley Puthoff, I believe it is, whose creepy wife baby-sat when the parents went on vaca when she worked with the Sarah-Mom at Dubuque Internal Medicine.  So diseased corruption and backwardness, ignorance, bigotry, and injustice persists, oftentimes because people don't do what's right but help their so-called friends and neighbors with their cover-ups.
     It came to me in Spirit the other day during a walk that "there's no one left to enforce."  That Spirit meant the law.  Because so many have fallen to disgrace.  So what we'll be left with is a society of lesser evils?  What bothers me is "that has no desire to change or be led another way?"
     Allen (the stepson) had called more than once.  I finally talked to him--heatedly on my part--and it's not good for them.  Having said that, if you feel like some blood for supper, you might be able to find the next Hostess' in the sashimi since the only thing left is for him to jack her if she takes off from her Hostess stand with her left foot, not her right.
     TAIKO Japanese Steakhouse & Sushi Bar has officially joined Amy Jin's "American Wall of Shame."  I've chalked them (both--Eddie and Rose) up as a waste of an Asian checkbox.

Do or die,

*Image of Amy Jin as a happy baby in a cute little pink dress, sitting for a cliched-but-requisite baby photographer because pink is the best color, other than black."

"My first experience with talent recruitment was when two farm(-turned-city) kids from Iowa picked me from all the other South Korean babies who needed mothers and fathers and said, 'We'll take this one.' Then, following my engagement of the United States of America as I grew up, I was thrown into all the 'Talented and Gifted' programs and sent to all the youth leadership conferences, kind of in a whirlwind. Some call it destiny. Either way, it is so written." -Amy Jin

Love Yoga: The Movement

www.WhatItIsPowerYoga.blogspot.com

Dubuque, Iowa

Temp.-563.556.3524

*To be removed from the Love Yoga: The Movement Database, simply respond to this e-mail and say that. This Database is reserved for Love Yoga: The Movement Love Offerers/donors, paid healing/Spiritual Illumination clients, V.I.P. colleagues, my connections in related industries, regular practitioners of the work itself, and others in the moment becuz I say so.*

*+CORRUPTION ALERT II: Crenna's Back & The Grand Pubas--De Amy Jin-W/12.12.2012*

*Image of Amy Jin in Seated Meditation*

ZEN. YOGA.

Spiritual Law Supercedes The Laws of Men.

And Always Will.

Pass it on.
My true yogs & others,
     Today was the close of a very long court situation stemming from a questionable parking ticket I received months ago on Bluff Street (left side of the street after turning right off Loras, a few blocks before the library), amidst a barrage of old and new signs that seem to confuse one another, rather than highlight clearly what U're supposed 2 do.
     I want you to know that there was a rider on this final circumstance for me, personally. That was before the launched attack on me earlier by the people who raised me and before I knew I'd then be violated by Sedona Staffing Services/McGraw-Hill less than a week later. No big deal. I don't like you--today--so how 'bout I take your livelihood from U?
     First, our taxpayer dollars are being wasted by the process of appeal in this city. After feeling that my good faith request for consideration wasn't even considered by Tim/his Parking Services Dept., not being able to get a straight answer on whether or not they had the power to overturn or show mercy in the situation, and being told that they couldn't see how I found the signs confusing at all, I decided to take this to court on principle, as always. I felt strongly it was the right thing to do. I felt almost in a burgeoning way that there have been other people taken advantage of or in the right in similar situations who've run scared from the "authorities" and their scare tactics and simply paid their tickets.
     Our money was wasted the first time I met Crenna Brumwell in person (You will see her involved in the Safe Strides Human Rights case I opened earlier in the year, listed on the website), which I assumed was to actually see a judge and get some straight answers but, instead, was a wasted afternoon of waiting forever--way after the incident--in a courtroom full of people, only to get called up to sit with her and an unknown assistant, to hear, "So you do want a court date? Why would you want to do that?"
     Seriously?!!!
     That's a given! You're getting paid for this AND dragging this silly thing out even further now?
     I have to mention that one of the last times I got in trouble for anything--other than in instances of getting killed for standing up for the truth alone--was when I received a parking ticket, I think in 2009 while I was still living in Los Angeles, I think in Hollywood. I intuitively sensed that there was something askew with the ticket, so rather than freak out, pay it angry, etc., I contacted Parking Services and explained that I had been visiting some of the clothing stores that day, had gone into one store, knew exactly how many minutes I had left, came back out in time, didn't check the meter, either way, & saw the ticket (not all quite that immediately, but pretty much) later. I just said honestly that I really didn't think it was physically possible for me to have run out of time because I was watching it.
     They went and researched it, and I kind of thought there would be nothing I could do about it. I was already turning in my 401K to eat about a meal & 1/2 a day, and there wasn't a glimmer of hope anywhere in the country--job, yoga, or anything-wise, including back in the Midwest.
     Imagine my, "Really?!!! That's amazing!!!" when I received a phone call from Parking Services stating that their investigation revealed that they had tracked down the meter at hand in my case and that it did, in fact, have a timekeeping issue, so my ticket was being cleared/voided!
     Today, I did not find myself on the court times list. That's because Jenny, Crenna Brumwell (who I found out is not even the City Attorney but an "assistant")'s, assistant, told me that she'd moved my court date back to today, after some retooling it due to my McGraw-Hill schedule, but she didn't actually get that accomplished. When I came back to the house today, I found a letter stating that it'd been moved to January, leaving the letter late and still unclear as to whether or not it'd actually been moved or moved back, based on what Jenny had "confirmed" with me.
     Apparently whoever the City/Plaintiff needed there was there, anyway, in the mix-up with dates/times. Otherwise, it would've been pushed off until January. Again.
     My case was based on 6 points of contact with Parking Services that caused me to escalate this as something requiring a higher power (the Judge) to hopefully see that the world is not flat--that it is actually round:
1. & 2. The ticket itself. Standing underneath the signs, & then thru 2 meetings with Peggy in Parking Services, hoping to avoid going to court (which I couldn't afford) because Tim was conveniently avoiding me, I still did not honestly understand how to read the signs they had posted together, and I don't think I have to explicate that intelligence level or a desire to be in compliance were not the issues. It took that long before she was actually able to explain that the signs were to be read separately, not together. But it was that clear from the beginning. The 2. is that I got the feeling, too, as I mentioned, via intuition, that they were trying to pull a power trip on me, even though they could see what I was saying but wanted things their way.
3. Their exhibits/photos of my car & the signs that day, sent to me beforehand, were missing a stipulation sign stating to not park on that side of the street during certain weird days and wee hours of morning, which was the sign that made the rest of them confusing. The photocopy of my ticket conveniently was missing the back, which showed a (my) hand-written good faith not-understanding what the signs were trying to say, including the sign missing from their pictures.
4. Hypothetically, I asked Peggy, then, was there a hard and fast rule about parking signs? I mean, if two or more are there, are they always read separately or together? "No, there's no rule. Sometimes they are read together. Sometimes they're not." Wow. It's worse than I thought. How deep does the rabbit hole go?
5. Channeling the solution. Sometimes it's been said that if you're going to focus on problems, it helps to have a solution. Maybe that's why, as I was standing there, "Wow. This is b.s. There's something amiss about this," all of a sudden in dawned on me. "Wait," I said to Peggy on that second visit, "So you mean this?" I showed her how I would move the signs and eliminate one to make it totally clear and she, and the women in the office with her got really quiet, and she just said, "Oh." So did everyone at the house when I returned and showed them the clearer sign layout. So did the cop, Officer Lindecker, who'd helped me with the guy who'd tried killing me on my 125 with his vehicle, earlier in the year. He even tried going to Tim for me (I'm sure because it was so clear I was wrong), but he was trying while Tim was gone on vacation. So now everyone sees that the old clear isn't nearly as clear as the new, proposed clear. Yet the powers that be that created the old, foggy clear want it to be their way, because it keeps them in power, so I started feeling all sorts of violent intimidation & bullying about just paying the ticket even while on my yoga mat. I also saw myself winning the case from my mat. Maybe that was metaphorical.
6. And, last but not least, I felt that Tim lied. He all of a sudden called me back after I think I'd said, "Fine. I'll take it to court. I have to now." He called me to say there really wasn't anything he could do about it. I said, "U could overturn it. I think you're lying to me." He kept insisting I needed to go to court over it. I said again I couldn't afford to and was hoping he would admit he was wrong--that the signs were interpretable, at best. What was interesting is that everybody in this situation seemed quieted when I said I was from Dubuque but had spent most of my adult life in larger cities. I thought, "Is it possible that you're supposed to be able to grok what the crappy signs mean just by virtue of having been here the whole time & just 'getting' their inferior-but-in-power way?'"
     That's exactly what happened today. After Crenna had cornered me in an empty room and greeted me by saying, "So why R we here today?" and basically attacking me when I answered, kind of like, "I'm gonna kick your a**, so why R U even going to try?" I said, "Because I represent the truth, and I still am unclear about how to read those signs, even now, and the citation is for violating 'clearly marked signage.'" She asked me what I was going to say. I thought the whole conversation was strange, firstly given her aggressive, bullying attitude, but based on what my life's been like in recent years, especially when it comes to law or wannabe authorities, I guess I was desensitized, but I told her. "Well, I'm gonna say (such-and-such), and you can't say what any of those other people told you or thought because that'll be considered 'hearsay,' and I'll strike that down." Wow. "You know what," I said, "Go ahead. Say it." She mentioned something about it then, but it wasn't until we were in court and I realized that she wasn't a neutral party on behalf of the city escorting me to the room--She was the attorney I was going up against and I was, in fact, representing myself (as always!!!).
     That's when it hit me, based on some of the ground rules that were laid, and the realization of how corrupt this was all looking already, that I probably should've had witnesses, even though I felt my solution should've spoken for itself. Get rid of the old signs. Place better the updated ones. Don't let them all sit there together. Put them at the right height. Leave it at that.
     Here's what I will say. My father always told me when I was little that I should be an attorney. He said it was because I liked to argue, which I always said was untrue. I always said, "I like the truth." What he didn't have to say but was understood between us is that he also noticed the % of times I was right, which was pretty much every time.
     And today, I listened to this looney lady hear my story, as clearly and honestly as I've been telling it from the beginning, stating that I wasn't there to be adversarial and that if I honestly felt that the ticket was well-meted out, I would've already paid it, regardless of my circumstances, if it was within my power. I watched as she held with her mental power all things in place, like a spoiled child, just as I'd watched a much worse court case (mentioned on the website) unfold about me down in Phoenix regarding being slaughter-ticketed and bullied on a 107? 110? degree day on the pavement by a scary, scary Officer Jones, "This is not a case about solutions!" she said to my clearer sign exhibit. I was silent. "Wow, did she just say that?" I thought. Let her lead the people, for sure--not me.
     I could tell I was making an impact on the Magistrate, but I could also tell she was affecting him. That's when the hideousness of our judicial system (and this is a pretty innocent situation, but when evil's there, it's there. No hiding it) totally hit me. It's possible for a pretty perfect citizen to come into a case, tell 100% the truth, be probably as deserving of leniency/consideration as anyone, and, on top of it, have something of value to say that could help bring increased clarity to the city infrastructure, and here's this lady, seemingly old enough to be her mother, trying to take her out, even though she'd heard the words, "homelessness," "overqualified," "unpunished corruption," "prolonged under/unemployment," "clarity, "improved signage," and "good faith???"
     It was about the time that she started running around, following some of the cross-examination points and questions I posed, putting her witness back up on the stand, then asking her questions in a voice that seemed to want the judge to hear what was being said but not me, including asking the ticketing agent to speak to how the signs in the pictures were TURNED (Are you SERIOUS?!!!), that I was proud as punch of the way, when I heard Source calling me in 2000, I followed, and have never walked astray. You should've seen her run to find new questions when I looked at the ticketing cop, after they assumed I wasn't going to ask any questions, & said, "The turning of signs to indicate meaning--a little towards the street or a little towards the sidewalk--would I find that in the law books?!" "Uh, I don't know." "It sounds like the nuances of someone's personality, not our laws," I said. Never before has it been as clear how lacking in power the "justice" system has become and how superior God's laws are, how humbling it is to watch their slow but inevitable roll in and thru our lives. If we are wise, we exit the karmic system and see that if we are responsible for evil, not the truth, we are held to it and do receive the boomerang back, in a way that makes sense 2 us on a deep soul level, if we R honest.
     I have never felt more that the material world was inferior to what I have found.
     In the end, I was scolded, again, like a child, for accidentally referring to something somebody had told me in Parking Services when I asked if I could finally get a clear answer on it. The judge caved to Brumwell's soul-less militancy and 3-year-old-who-wants-a-suckerness and, when I said, "Wow. This is looking really bad. For all of YOU. Not me," there was no response. Because that's exactly what it looked like. Not even the law. Our opinion in our small town, small-mindedness. We're not ready to see the world as round yet. That means your vision rules, not ours (1.10: I think I meant the opposite way around.  There R a few other typos uncorrected in this & the previous piece.  I'm hoping U'll catch & roll thru them since this thing has been acting weird when I try to edit).  And even if that means taking everyone down with us, why in the world would we do otherwise?
     The reality was, beyond the rules of law, they could tell who had supported already what I saw but were simply not there to say it and, if nothing else, I was telling the truth and had no other motives than that.
     I got vocal once the judge basically said, "Yeah, I mean, I see what you're saying, but it's fine the way it is." I said, "What you're upholding is someone's personality preferences about what the signs mean, not ensuring that they're universally clear. I'm telling you they're not clear, and you're saying you're not only not going to change the signs now but are going to fine me, anyway, instead of paying me a consulting fee." I turned to Crenna, "And, Crenna, I didn't appreciate your backing me into a corner before we started basically telling me to not fight you!"
     Perhaps why I sensed them really deeply stalling off and on during this case was that riding on it was a deep soul decision on my part. I told myself that if I experienced any of the bulls**t I'd experienced in other parts of the country there, or with them, I was officially disinterested in contributing to this society and would take my soul power elsewhere.
     When I burst out of the courtroom, she said, "You forgot your helmet!" I went back, grabbed it from her, & said, "Like you care!!! Total corruption...I'll be sure to tell everyone. Don't worry!"
     I ran across the street to the police station & ended up talking to 2 officers about what I'd just seen. I told them who I was, where I've been, and what I've seen in other parts of the country. They were supportive, encouraged me to call the City Attorney ("Crenna's not the City Attorney?!") and the City Manager, whose wife had high praises for me and my writing while we met via e-mail when I was stuck in Phoenix, you know, and tell them what happened and have them look into how Crenna behaved, as well as present my ideas about the signage if no one else was listening.
     Both Crenna and the judge, separately, got me further confused as they explained (I'm pretty sure incorrectly) today what the signs actually meant. So, by their own explication, they were not A.) interested in the truth but in me doing what I should've telepathically got was "the way" of the weird & wacky signs, B.) were not there to see if what I said had any legitimacy and consider solutions based on my testimony. & C.) said that basically compassion doesn't exist in American justice. Just power trips, lies, and ganging up on people--Oh! And they don't exist to provide correct answers to things: "So the main liaison between the Director of Parking Services was unable to explain how the signs actually read until halfway thru all my interactions with them, implicitly agreed my layout was clearer, & also couldn't provide any clear policies on how to read single or grouped signs, so who has the actual answers since you don't either?" Just competitiveness, as-long-as-I-win-even-if-I'm-less-right-than-you-are, & an inhumane disconnectedness from other people.
     I am inspired to take the LSAT now & spend the rest of my life consciously decaying.
     So I've written Mike VanMilligan, have a meeting with the CEO of Sedona Staffing Services & the HR Manager from McGraw-Hill on Friday (at their request)(because I'm kind & could also care less now in maximized strength--the CEO is aware of what happened today), & am now looking at where enlightenment could best be grown.
     It certainly can't be on this hard & wretched soil.

God's Justice To All That Exists.

*Image of Amy Jin in Urdhva Dhanurasana*

"Be like the rain, the earth, the sunshine.

Merge with the trees, and U will know life."

-Amy Jin, Love Yoga: The Movement

www.WhatItIsPowerYoga.blogspot.com

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Subject: P.S.: *+CORRUPTION ALERT II: Crenna's Back & The Grand Pubas--De Amy Jin-W/12.12 .2012*

Date: 12/12/2012 10:48:31 P.M. Central America Standard

Dream Interpretation: The Grand Master Hoods
     It came to me to tell this story, and I needed to do something before polishing this off.

     Some of you have been speaking to me lately about vivid or poignant dreams you've had recently, which I've talked about in some of the last E-Updates.
     I, too, have been having a lot of dreams/somewhat nightmarish dreams recur I'll say in recent months, including 1 cake topper I'll call the story of the "Grand Master Hoods."
     When I was very small, I had a recurring nightmare I may have squeaked word of once or twice to my adoptive mother, to which, I'm sure, I was likely dismissed or something like it. When I had it, I would wake up in the middle of the night, drenched in my own sweat, at least once bawling, sobbing from the deepest soul place in terror and sadness.
     I guess it was supposed to be our house, but in some scenes, it seemed more underground railroad times-ish--like in the deep south, but I think it was pretty clearly this house. It was night, and I think I received word that there were evil forces coming for me. For some reason, I feel that there were human/supernatural/possibly even animate animal-type helpers for me in this scenario, but the bottom line is I was little in the dream, as well, and soon there were huge, all-Grand Master Ku Klux Klansmen approaching and trying to invade our house. Their clothing signified to me that they were somewhat super-powered and more important within their ranks but came from two separate kinds or branches, so to speak, since some wore all red, some all royal blue. I cannot remember if my adoptive family was there or not, or if they helped or not. My feeling is that they did and were scared, too, but I don't recall they did anything directly helpful. I assumed that they, too, were in danger.
     I do think I always ended up escaping, and I wondered why all those powerful Grand Masters would be coming for one small child. The dream always ended up unresolved, as in I always sensed that they would continue to come after me, like those who sought the Ring from Frodo Baggins.
     I also wondered why they wore red and blue.
     This past election season, I had a certain flash of that nightmare during my yoga practice one day. I felt grounded and somewhat sullen at remembering it, but that was it.
     Then, somewhat like the Darwin Barney experience in one of the past E-Updates I sent, I was walking by a television that was on some days later, on my way to the shower, and some kind of heated something about the heating-up election was on. Huge on the screen was something about the two parties. Huge on the screen was red. And blue. And, in one of the most strange and powerful alignments of the cosmos, all coalescing within my mind, my body, my heart I felt and realized in a way that had no words, but if it did, it would've said:
     "Oh. My. God."

Celestial power,
Ananda.

Until You Are, You're Not. -Amy Jin

*Image of Amy Jin in Prasarita Padottanasana--A Creative Variation*

www.WhatItIsPowerYoga.blogspot.com

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The City Manager did write back, quite immediately, actually, but ended up coming to the conclusion after discussing it with the City Attorney that it was better to defend the "clique," as usual, which certainly seems "Dubuque"-ish--not Iowa.  Building karma for later.

Re: *+DUBUQUE ALERT: Illegal Discrimination At McGraw-Hill--Amy Jin-F/12.7.2012*

From this E-Update.  Two fun-filled weeks at McGraw-Hill--i.e. Iowa-can't-do-it-any-better!:

     The msg that I put at the top disappeared after sending (This has happened for the 1st time now twice recently).
     I was "released" from this assignment by Sedona Staffing Services when the named supervisors pulled me into an interrogation room (along with the named female in a different one), by Ericka (spell check) and Joyce, 2 African-American women, who our class has had no interaction thus far, and Ericka came at me as an aggressor, as though I'd done something wrong, and I defended myself--detailing, in fact, what the correct protocol would've been in my professional experience, in dealing with the situation below.
     When I mentioned being attacked and then fired for it, they said, "You're not being fired," especially when, finally, Joyce held space for what actually was said, and they said, "Ohhhh."
     Then, the 3rd supervisor (a Caucasian woman also from the day before), came in and was ready to jump all over me before Ericka and I realized I'd just used the wrong name while explaining what had happened. That was interesting.
     I had given the (-->1.10--Typo) Todd, the lead trainer, my resume today. I was told when they turned around from my "everything's squashed" meeting with them (It was for me yesterday already), they've added to the list that I "attacked Todd." Even Renee at Sedona Staffing Services laughed when I said, "For handing him my Resume?"
     The security guard, both of whom (2 males), I had great rapport with. When Renee walked me out, I said, "Hey! I've just been illegally discriminated against! I'll never see U again!" The older one said, "U have your badge! U can come back whenever U want!" He was serious (This is so classic for this situation). The other one said, "Yeah!" And Renee didn't blink about it. I turned to all 3 of them and said, "Here--U should take this." And only once turned as I walked out the door, "The only way I'd come back is if they made me CEO, which is really what it's looking like should happen."
     And Ericka knew "all about being racially discriminated against" since she's Black. Even though I had to tell her that racial discrimination can be meted out by anyone of any color.
     Feel the ripple effects of what has happened to me, Dubuqueland.
     Grave mistakes.
     And for all the leaders on the list, myself included, "It's not US. It's YOU. The weak, sick, ugly, and disintegrated leading is the problem. Not the few brave or destined." A woman with illegitimate children, sounds like by multiple men, who described herself to the class as "lost" (and she wasn't just talking about having no Business or IT background) is now the bar-setting standard at McGraw-Hill (headquarters in Burr Ridge [Chicago], IL), not me. If the shoe fits, wear it.
     Is this really the world I was groomed to lead?
     This is what happens when people R not in their right places. And the more it happens, the worse it gets.
     I don't think much of humanity or care much about anything or anyone, at this point.
     I'll be back at Carlos O'Kelly's on Monday since John (the GM) was my first contact after this happened just a couple hours ago. After that, it remains to be seen.
     I want you all to be very clear about what ignorance and evil does to our minds, bodies, hearts, and souls--the fabric of society broken, stained, and unwound by the blood of our saints and wayshowers.

It will not last.

*Image of Amy Jin in Supta Virasana*

"I ask that life stop being a cliche...so that I no longer feel as if I have to go away to a mountain in order to experience a context--any context--that is real besides the ones I, alone, create."

-Amy Jin

Love Yoga: The Movement

www.WhatItIsPowerYoga.blogspot.com

Dubuque, Iowa

Temp.-563.556.3524

In a message dated 12/7/2012 2:32:13 P.M. Central America Standard T, EternalLove47@aol.com writes:

(1.10: I guess the intro. was there somehow--in copying & pasting it decides to show up?  It's been removed, though, since now it is redundant):

Subject: Love Yoga: The Movement Scheduling/One-On-One Enlightenment Services
Date: 12/6/2012 7:02:32 P.M. Central America Standard Ti

     I am wanting to gather an idea of what the next 6 mos. to a year might look like, scheduling-wise, and if you don't know exactly yet, what your intentions are so that I can remain open for individual work. Obviously, I hope the number of practitioners who I am honored enough to work with on these levels grows and becomes regularly scheduled.
    Also, on the Power Yoga front, I spoke with a landlord today (about sacred living spaces) who mentioned that he just happens to have some storefronts down by the library for a very attractive price.
    Until then, we keep building.
    Other than getting into it with some litter next 2 me who, during our dress code discussion today, tried telling me I should shop for kids be4 going shopping myself, to which I said, "Do what U want, but if U wear whatever U want & get fired, how much is that going 2 help your kids?" "Well, when U have kids, you'll know." "I probably won't have kids (The immediacy of my response shocked me)," I said, folding my arms (She is half German, half Native American or something, which makes this interesting). The guy we're both kind of cool with, who sits on her other side, also is a single parent, from what it sounds like, & is about my age, said, "That's smart." She turned to him, who related to me later (after I moved seats--& had the trainer's support 4 doing so 1st thing this morning [The lady also wreaks of smoke]) that he was also about to move away to not sit by her, & said, "It's becuz she's SELFISH" and something else I couldn't hear. I said, "WHAT did U just say?!" She said, "Nothing." She paused & said, "Just because I wasn't born with a silver spoon in my mouth." I said, "You don't know anything about my life, so don't judge me." She went silent. Then I said, "If you say anything like it again, I'll go straight 2 the Supervisors on U--pause--or straight to HR." "You know what? I've dropped it, and so should U." I said, "No YOU already said it, so it's already done. YOU need to SHUT UP."
     A few moments later, I couldn't even sit next 2 her anymore, so I whisked by one of the female trainers who's a Theatre major who I got the same idea about, in terms of her relationship 2 me, "You should ask that lady what she just said."
     This spurred her going to the actual Supervisory team we'll actually be working with. They called a brief hold on class & then came in and made a preschool-level announcement that we need to not disrupt class or say inappropriate things or ask questions that don't pertain directly 2 the lesson.
     To which I pulled said female trainer, then, out to the hall be4 lunch (The head trainer even commented that that talk made the room somewhat like a "morgue"), then laying into her about levels of professionalism, stating that it was 1 thing to have a non-IT/Business person try to judge, lecture, and then YELL at me about making babies and how to spend my money?!!!?!?, but to have 2 "Supervisors" walk in and try to blanket lecture the class on what'd just happened, without separating the attacker out to call her on it--That BETTER not have my name on it because if McGraw-Hill is saying that they'll throw a rape victim in jail with the rapist, we're on to one interesting world. And I'm done. I'll have nothing to do with it.
     Oddly, when I returned to the house, the Sam-Dad & Sarah-Mom were being nicer to me. She had made vegetarian chili, were going to some memorial 4 my grandma who died, as some of U know, earlier this yr., & apparently R leaving me the house this weekend. After breaking down & telling her/he was listening that A.) I think I'd found my apt., B.) this story, & C.) wondered aloud if anyone had ever taken someone from ground level & taken them directly to CEO--that that's about what it looked like should happen, & D.) that at least I didn't get fired or ganged up on here, which is a good sign. I mean, in every other part of the country where I got bullied, fired, or mentally/spiritually raped by some trash--Black, White, Mexican--doesn't matter--I'd look around on a day like 2day 4 support, and all there'd be was more trash!!! So guess who'd get tortured & thrown out 4 being the anomaly & making everybody look bad?!!!
     Hopefully this finally drove that pt. home.
     I'm finished with trash of all colors. I need 2 be where I belong. And that's up very, very high.
     Other than that, in terms of today, I killed it.

In Servant Leadership, As Always,

*Image From Power Yoga Photo Shoot in Phoenix*

"I didn't come to express how you want me to.

I came to express what Source has put inside of me.

If U tell an elusive, magical, multi-dimensional unicorn to smile when you say 'Cheese,'

it's not going to do it."

-Amy Jin

www.WhatItIsPowerYoga.blogspot.com
Temp.-563.556.3524

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Subject: *+Update: Sedona Staffing Services/McGraw-Hill-De Amy Jin & LY:TM-F/12.14.2012*
Date: 12/14/2012 3:42:30 P.M. Central America Standard

     Meeting 2day with the CEO from Sedona Staffing Services & the Director? of HR from McGraw-Hill, at the CEO's request, regarding the incident at McGraw-Hill--both women, I believe, also originally from Dubuque.
     Very happy with all aspects of its proceedings/outcome.
     Please remember, I don't do facebook, twitter, etc., currently, despite requests.

Peace & Sanity 2 U All & All About U,

*Image of Amy Jin in Supta Virasana*

"I ask that life stop being a cliche...so that I no longer feel as if I have to go away to a mountain in order to experience a context--any context--that is real besides the ones I, alone, create."

-Amy Jin

Love Yoga: The Movement

www.WhatItIsPowerYoga.blogspot.com

Dubuque, Iowa

Temp.-563.556.3524

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As of TH/1.10.2013, there has been no resolution.  A McGraw-Hill internal investigation with a final meeting with the trashy agent was to have occurred Fridays ago, and they were to get back to us on what they were going to do about the wrongful termination.  Nikki at Sedona Staffing Services continues to work on my behalf to produce "better" possibilities, but, to my knowledge, has not pressed McGraw-Hill for right resolution, nor has McGraw-Hill offered anything, which just shows that everyone in this society would rather wait to be sued than do the pure and right things because it's the right thing to do.

On Sub-Humans

     To the few people who have consciously sent SPAM comments at all in this direction, U R the epitome of cowardice consciousness so common in this world.  Especially those of the technological age now largely decaying human potential, I know 4 a fact that U wouldn't be able to utter a word in my physical presence.
     Get out from behind your computers & say what you really want to say before me.
     I dare you.
     (Or R U one of the men who would start in on me with, "I know you've been with guys that R hotter than me..."  Wouldn't I need to be with you in order for you to say that?  So cyber tit-for-tatting on a spiritual Movement's what you do in your spare time, as the step down from in-person verbal, mental, emotional violence, or bigotry when U realize you're inferior?
     Oh, but you're not, which is why you're transmitting in this direction in a way that defines you as a waste of time, by all definitions, when no one from this Movement's harmed you.
     I owe you an invoice).

The United States of American Wall of Shame: Of Course, I Can Only Speak From Experience

I know some of U wanted that "New BBB" information. Shame on you for being too loser to ask.

Let's start at the very be-ginning. The only real place to start...

(Oh, we'll say 1980)-A racist, people-politic-y hometown (Dubuque, IA). I took your kids to school, anyway.

1996-Go to school and get the shaft from punk a** upperclassmen teammates and abusive, wicked witch coaches in varying shades--DEPAUL UNIVERSITY (Chicago, IL). Don't feed us on our road trips, make us run 'til people puke. Tell me to go seek a Psychologist because I'm "damaged" as everyone hides behind me (or takes solace in the Men's Basketball or Soccer teams, like musical beds, take up alcoholism, or worse) cuz I'm the only one who'll stand up to the coach & the A.D. I will. The Psychologist insinuates I have a brilliant mind & that the only thing I do "wrong," mentally, is think negatively about myself. "Some people don't need meds," she says, "They can do it by themselves." I'll definitely wonder about the fact that you're a lesbian, Coach, because I can't help but wonder if certain girls worked for their status by doing favors for the staff, all U power/glory-hungry hos. Threatened our scholarships 'til U were blue in the face. I'll keep it, thx. It's me, not U, that deserved to stay. I rocked the house in high school under pressure. Under torture? Go f**k yourself.

Where have U been while I've been dying in the Apocalypse all y'all PROFS who allowed me to teach your classes from my seat?!!

Top-notch Business School my a**!

LIFE!-Jealous a** women, how 'bout "mentors," "wise crone women," and "friends?" At least relegate yourself to the truth--you NEED ME to be anything but a p**sant.

2008-LINDY ("Droopy Dog"), the lying leasing agent and ROANOKE WEST (Kansas City, MO), thanks for making a priceless yoga teacher on an involuntary vow of poverty contaminate her own lungs in her own home as she leads the city in asana practice & throw ALL OF HER BEAUTIFUL, HARD-EARNED FURNITURE in the landfill because U completely lied about the secondhand smoke problem in the apartment community. Thx 2 LISA THE MANAGER, THE CRES MANAGEMENT, LLC CORPORATE OFFICE, my childhood doctor, DR. IAN KOONTZ & DUBUQUE INTERNAL MEDICINE that employed my adoptive mother her entire career!!!, THE KANSAS CITY BETTER BUSINESS BUREAU, THE KANSAS CITY HEALTH DEPT., REP. JAN WHAT'S-HER-FACE WHO SUPPOSEDLY WAS SO "GREEN," LIKE I AM, says the hands-tied Health Dept., my not-doing-s**t-about-anything, anyway, PARENTS for tormenting me & sticking up for Lindy, instead of helping get me the F**K out of there without paying fees on top of it!!! Thx 2 my yoga students, who I gave my life to, without hesitation, as the Recession hit, and thru life's ups and downs, especially those who were attorneys!!! for not doing S**T. Wait--you're all suffering from an abandonment complex, as it is, because now I've decided to move to L.A. instead of open up a Power Yoga shala for Kansas City to continue my journey & U're wondering why I won't stay & "make sure Kansas City is o-kay first?!!!" Really?!!!

2009-SANTA MONICA POWER YOGA (Santa Monica, CA), granted, things sync'd up, and I won the bid 2 teach the Sunday a.m. class opposite Bryan at the other location, in a way that even I found unbelievable, but when U tell me to show up after living off of the meager savings account I have for weeks, with 4x the amount of money I was originally told, U DARE send me energy of "you've just fallen off the ship" when U send my deposit back when I've given my life to you?!!! You could give a flying f that, now, one of the most up & coming Power Yoginis in the nation is completely income-less in the height of the Recession in Los Angeles, of all places, with well over a $1200/mo. rent?!?! I don't know--Can U sue a yoga shala?!!! Would I?!! No. And that's the point.

Thx to the JACK OFF PSYCHOLOGIST (Probably somewhere in Dubuque &/or Iowa!) my adoptive parents started seeing who allowed lynch mob sessions I could feel all the way out in L.A. where you talked about me behind my back, went around emitting that my yoga path & practice was an "addiction," like cocaine. It doesn't occur to them--ever--that you can't diagnose someone you've never met, much less based on religious practice. That's called bigotry. Oh wait--The cocaine thing--that was the kid from Dubuque who was out in L.A. flying around like a mad man that I think you'd hoped I'd hook up with?! when he needed saving from himself. Let's all find out who that QUACK was and stone (most likely) her (C/KATHY at HILLCREST FAMILY SERVICES or the little twit, CAROLINE/CAROLYN [same place], from Oregon [Does she routinely sleep with the people she helps?]--& you could tell--both of whom blatantly needed me more than I needed them, upon meeting them both???) in the public square. I've already endured countless and, somehow, have not died.

Thx 2 my psychopath ITALIAN? SUBTERRANEAN PARKING NEIGHBOR WITH THE AIR FORCE JACKET WHO LOOKED ABOUT MY AGE, with the reddish, Toyota pick-up who verbally assaulted me, threatening me, my new Prius, for being, literally, about an inch too close to the parking line separating us, then taking after it with a sharp object on all sides. THX 2 WESTSIDE TERRACE (Los Angeles, CA) for doing nothing, as usual. Thx for not even changing my parking spot, only to find out that half of the reason that I lived in burning terror the several months I was there, before I paid most of my food money, as an 80-year-old, to get out of my lease, to go back to a family that could've given a rat's arse about any of it, was because the bastard lived across the hall from me the whole time, & you KNEW IT!!! Note 2 U, you long-haired ponytailed, greasy piece of S**T, even I was shocked when I received multiple encouragings from Source to totally take out all of my unleashed rage on your truck. I guess it's a standing offer if I ever find U again. Of course, I didn't, becuz I'm a saint. Karmically, I think that makes you dead by now. You're one of the most disgusting creatures I've ever had to lay my eyes upon. Same 2 U, Westside Terrace, BRIAN, THE MANAGER, THE SKINNY, DISGUSTING, SLIMY BLACK CHICK (She's so important that her name [Begins with an "S," I think][Will be corrected if/when I find it] evades me)--your staff who did my apartment walk for me, skipped out on my initial move-out meeting, then walked in with a pre-printed damages list, & the aforementioned wannabe Amy Jin chick walks in, waves her hand around at imaginary marks on the wall--must've been from my furniture--Oh wait! I don't HAVE any still because of LINDY, ROANOKE WEST, and my chain-smoking, cretin, vampire neighbors on all sides!!!--and makes me sign on the dotted line that that's what she wrote! while I'm still protesting, "WHAT?! There's nothing there!" There goes $250 as WESTSIDE TERRACE steals from the Recession-struck and poor, like a routine physical, even after I fight them after the fact, realizing I'd signed away money they've just stolen from me. The fact that my apartments always look better when I leave them than when I move in (As a known fact by people who have known me & landlords both) makes no difference now in a corruption-infested country that's making everybody's-doing-it out of illegality. U go, R.W. SELBY & COMPANY, INC. CORPORATE OFFICE & THE (scandal-wracked) LOS ANGELES BBB. You are completely impotent, if you're not bankrupt.

NATALEE THAI ON VENICE, way to have crazy addicts as bartenders & RACHEL THE SERVER who would burn holes in the back of my head & assault me on the regular as I ran the restaurant from my hostess stand. Try to pull power trips on me and where I park my car, months into my employment working nights and weekends--without complaint or hesitation, like a veteran restauranteur--saving all your employees from being lost souls, actually helping them have pride in their home state that they left for the lottery ticket of Hollywood/L.A. I have to admit, though, your Thai Iced Tea did rock my world.

Meanwhile, my only sibling takes me out of her wedding without hesitation after my Mom tells me, as I'm wondering if I'll have a home next month, that I'll ruin the wedding by coming back with my soft, yoga teacher energy, especially since I'm a vegetarian and am told that I don't get a special meal, even though I'm the bride's only sister. As I'm down to one meal a day, she's marrying some a**hole she probably met on the Internet who's screwing her to control her new Pharmacist's salary, & fortunately, her Goddess older sister is being killed off remotely, including by our abusive, lying parents & now, I hear, our extended family (WHAT. THE. F**K--Crucifixion, definitely, without a trial)?!?!?! I guess this is her way of getting back at me for growing up in my shadow & having all her high school boyfriends want to get with her Korean Barbie doll older sister? I called U a b**ch once, using one of my only curse word cards, when we were at a family holiday dinner because you actually really needed to hear it, vs. watching me be murdered as an adult? I guess I should've figured it out, up to then, when U never reciprocated on birthday cards or presents. I guess that's how U can really tell that we're both adopted.

Thx to all the "celebrity" yogs supported by Yoga Journal and GAIAM who knew me or of me and did nothing. You're the real thing. Fo' sho'. All the yogs of my generation R watching, & we're, like, SO INSPIRED. Oh wait--Some of U ARE of my age-bracket. There's definitely hope for anyone but myself.

Within days, I'd manifested a yoga shala on J.F.K. in my hometown, with landlord help, had part-time jobs on the line, in spite of my adoptive dad's adamant statement in 2006 when I first received the directive from Source that he'd "NEVER" help me open a Power Yoga shala (putting a period on my decision to leave my job and students in Dubuque and return to Kansas City), but my adoptive mother, who'd started practicing yoga, too (or whatever it's called when it's at BODY & SOUL WELLNESS CENTER AND SPA, that I helped open, as its Business Consultant, on slave labor wage--Here's where "Should I?" or "Shouldn't I?" just started becoming "Yes'"--and who pretty much put an energetic cap on the magnetism my classes could radiate at their space, dismissing it with a wave of the hand as, "It's too hard." I'll save U from the disclosure of the truth truth. U know the one I mean. For now), rants thru my yoga practice like Satan incarnate. Then, they both kick me out of the house, into the fricking, freezing cold & tell me I'm "insane" and not to come back until I get "help" (Wait, this is sounding awfully familiar) for bringing up something from childhood that maybe was a little too honest for them to look at. I forgot that common householders could give a s**t about the kind of states created by the truth.

KANSAS UNEMPLOYMENT INSURANCE (Kansas, U.S.A.), could U wreak of bulls**t anymore as you, like CA & AZ that followed you, did everything and anything to demonize me and my horrific, perpetual state of "overqualified" in this country in torturous, shame-of-the-United-States-of-America businesses, across industries, which starts to look really silly when the person's a superhuman, to not give me the pittance I had coming to me to at least eat?! Did U talk to my modeling agency?!!! I knew U cared!!!!

Thx to KENNY THOMAS OLATHE TOYOTA (Olathe, Kansas) for shaking in their boots when I'd come in for service because I seemingly knew more about my Prius than they did. Thx for making me walk around screwed in one of the worst winters in Kansas City history when I returned to a barren wasteland where Kansas City used to be, after L.A., after my parents kicked me out in the snow without a place to go next or a job, because of their issues, when I called you back & said, "There's something I forgot about in my buyback figure." The GM (Ask Daniel, my salesman--THE ARROGANT, SPOILED, OWNER'S SON? I don't remember his name) said, "Oh well. We're not giving you anything more for the Prius." Well, between that & that nightmarish collision center U sent me to after I ran over the freshly hit deer someone else had just hit at 3 in the morning, about 2 months after I'd bought the car, that totally jacked up the bottom and the fuel tank, take the fricking Prius, becuz I have a feeling you've got some horrible karma coming 2 U! You SUCK!!! I reiterate that all the way up the corporate ladder, thru about every form of communication. Boom shockalocka--global floor mat recall, plus plus plus!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2009-2010-SIX40 (Kansas City, MO), way to be the I've-lost-count apartment community to lie about clear and non-negotiable bullet points on my "Should I live here?" list. It just happens to be that in one of the worst winters in Kansas City history when I happen to not be able to find income or a single place to teach, sell my car back, & get screwed on that, that I live in one of the worst neighborhoods, albeit totally revitalized!, in the Metro Area, because U assure me that, especially in the time I've been gone, the whole area's been turned around. Right. That's why there were vehicles with lights flashing lined up all the way down the street my first night in my new place--for another "incident" on the street corner that caused a detriment to somebody's life. And why I felt like I had my life blood sucked out of me every day & night in my new apartment by the other residents--especially by the guy who, U know, REALLY, REALLY liked me. U make me proud to be a Marketer.

KABABESH GRILL & BAR, NEW CAFE TANDOOR, BRIO ON THE PLAZA, & PIZZA BAR, for all the beauty various aspects of your restaurants added to my experiences, going under is no excuse for not paying your employees, not running your restaurant, sexual harrassment, racism, & not giving a s**t about your employees' lives. Way to make it look to the Unemployment System, though, as though I quit without reason when U can't keep your word on hours, don't pay me right or on time, and do everything wrong for someone who does everything glowingly above standard which, conveniently, then, makes her the anomaly and easy to bully. Way to use any intelligence you have for, U know, evil.

2010-Again, BUFFALO WILD WINGS, (Dubuque, IA), did you REALLY fill my hours at your supposedly struggling store after SOUTH BAY & BURBANK, CA, then about EVERY STORE IN THE KANSAS CITY METRO AREA also renigged on multiple offers (What's a struggling Creative, much less yog, supposed to do--I mean, it's like the executive version of a starving artist), causing me hundreds of dollars in lost wages by booking arrangements that couldn't be undone since they were done thru online budget sources, or were you just allowing the bullying, religious harrassment, & racism that was there all along to have its way?! At least Chad was down enough to coin me your "Asian Zing" & put the sticker on my nametag, explaining why I got as many phone numbers as I did $$$'s in tips.

Now I'm physically assaulted by my adoptive mother, for which I'm basically pushed into a corner by my adoptive father, saying that I need to "apologize to my mother." Apparently, I triggered the rage and deserved it for (still?) existing. I am now riding a one-speed Santa Monica beach cruiser around the only place I've ever called "home," really--with roots--in the United States of America. In the rain. Up massive hills. In the dark. As my adoptive parents pretty much mock me & tell me to "get a job." My ears have finally recovered from frostbite that I got in Kansas City as 70-year-old-looking fortysomethings and baby boomers drove by looking at me like I was the lunatic walking around in the snow. Except for the hot boys who ended up giving me rides, in synchronicity with my unbearable circumstances, who then ended up becoming obsessed fans I had to figure out how to get rid of (when I could feel my ears). I'm learning that all the people who were like our family--that I was taught were the better people in our hometown--are all watching, assuming, talking about me like evil, unrecognizable demons behind my back, rather than saying, "What the f**k, local celebrity rockstar athlete, one-of-the-smartest-most-accoladed-nicest-kids-to-ever-come-up-thru-our-city?!! R U o-KAY?!!!?!" I realized maybe it was their equivalent for their kids never really getting the grades that I did? Or R they just racist pieces of work. It's not a question.

At least 2011-STATE OF CALIFORNIA UNEMPLOYMENT INSURANCE, boy, did it take a barge and its distant (and I do mean distant) cousin, the spaceship, to get U to give me my money way after I should've already been dead from any number of "elements." How many employers' names, next steps, or crucial pieces of information could you screw up and have me fix for you without putting me on payroll as an independent contractor??? And the dudes with the weird accents that seemed deliberate in not getting me the information I needed to get over to Arizona's system that U said you'd look into and never got back to me on--Was that a Hollywood spoof on "Terrorist Employees Getting Paid While You Don't?!"

2012-When U know you're done sharing walls with people years ago, but there's this little problem called "no income flow, like nada," maybe the universe just keeps giving U signs anyway. Like the number of apartment communities who I've trusted & gone with frauding me out starting to cross over onto the fingers of my other hand. CRYSTAL CREEK APARTMENTS ON BELL ROAD (PHOENIX, AZ) & AMC, LLC CORPORATE OFFICE for saying, "You signed the lease" when the lease killed 10 trees up and down Bell, so I cruised it with RUBEN as my tour guide, and when I asked specifically about if the utilities were based on individual usage, I was told "Yes," and I believed you. So when I have to pay out my lease from yet another state across the country after Circle K & your legal system, from ground up, starts trying to finish the job my adoptive family, JAMIE SMITH, THE GOMER SMITH FAMILY, MATT MCFADDEN, ERIN (DONNEL) CHAMBERS, my cousin, RENEE (TAUKE) PAYLOR, probably ANGIE (JOHANNINGMEIER) WHITE, my former high school & post-college best friend, probably the guy I decided not to "marry," JESSE STROHMEYER, because he couldn't take "no" for an answer, amongst about a trillion other things signaling that I was being used to provide a relationship that actually provided pleasure to every single other person I knew more than it did me (That's for the next book), haven't (--I think the rule was, "If you ever were assumed to or outrightly said you'd love and be there for her, no matter what, because she gave you 100x the enrichment in your time with her than you ever provided, or could've provided, you get to judge and turn on her without reason--and ESPECIALLY without contact for several years prior--when she finally asks for something in return--to know that you're still a good person), you can be sure you'll make the doomed list. It's in the Akasha, and what makes it worse is U knew about all the terror that went be4 U.

MY ADOPTIVE FAMILY, ALL THE CRONIES WHO WALK AROUND SMILING TO MY FACE--you sent me flowers when I was playing for Wahlert, but snickered to yourself when you saw me walking around on the other side of town this year because, you know, it was never meant to work out for me in this country because I'm Asian. And a woman.--MICHELLE MIHALAKIS AND SAFE STRIDES WOMEN'S SHELTER, ALL RELATED ENTITIES, and KIM WHO USED TO WORK AT DUBUQUE INTERNAL MEDICINE WITH MY ADOPTIVE MOM, you're a sick cult parading around like do-gooders. You wouldn't be here without men. DUBUQUE HUMAN RIGHTS DEPARTMENT, thx for doing ZILCHO as I was evicted for what were clearly discriminatory purposes, like your governmental counterparts in every other place where I've lived. There wasn't one person in that house who would've backed for one second that VOLUNTEER JO ELLEN was telling the truth about my using the phone without permission, when she's the one who handed it to me. She needs a straightjacket. You're right, though. It's hard to know what to do when I don't break real rules or bum cigarettes off people walking by outside, like everyone else who lives there since I practice yoga instead. To JOE MAGNO, PH.D., SHARON K.BAUMANN, SUE SAWVEL, COLLEEN HELGERSON, DANIELLE STONE, & the really lost red-headed PAM who runs around with them, and basically anyone from the original holistic healing center, now flowing or with negative karma with BODY & SOUL WELLNESS CENTER AND SPA, you are NOTHING compared to the avatars in my generation. You are lost human beings who bandwagon jump based on what gets you off energetically in the moment, have no real spiritual path or values, and act it. I can tell why the healing communities across the country have been dissipating into thin air since that's the strength with which you represent or DO anything real, powerfully loving, or healing. But have your orgies and dance around in all your past lives, praying to every deity under the sun. The real New Age is mastery, and it doesn't suck identity from or try to kill its young, who R its evolution, in order to be something. Going from adored to "She deserves being attacked and condemned and told she deserves to be killed for having no karma" is what one gets for moving away from Dubuque? How deep it's gotten with wannabes on the enlightenment path, as well. Pretty sure it was NICOLE KAISER FROM THE MARIA HOUSE (& SHERRY MCDONNELL who backed her) who hadn't even talked to me, personally, but heard about me from one of the zillion employees I had to re-tell my story to about who I was and why I needed to stay there, hopefully temporarily, and outrightly told me they all thought I was arrogant and would treat the other residents badly when I called in crisis, having exhausted all other places to stay, and therefore, would be judged as unsuitable for their Women's Shelter before even having met them in person, not because I'm the last person on the planet who should be without income or mainstream influence at a time like the one we're in. Thx, ADAM FEYEN, for stepping in to help, but then, the next day when Sharon went pschizo and decided she just wanted me out because she liked the licking flames from the lying crapbag called my adoptive father, looking to recruit people to his take-down-my-own-innocent-daughter team, said, "Oh, well, never mind."

LINSY (RANSDELL) ADAMS, LOCATORS LTD. (Dubuque, IA) & HER TOO STUPID, COWARDLY, & PETRIFIED-TO-DO-ANYTHING-ABOUT-IT WORKERS, thanks for stealing my application fee and then taunting me for demanding that I receive it back and saying, "I'll see you in court." Thanks for being a walking definition of "soul-on-up-ugly."

SHERRY, GM AT OKY DOKY ON HILL STREET, thanks for hiring, then eliminating me, again, for being overqualified, rather than at least give me full-time work, train me for leadership, and make sure that the pattern of bullying by soul-less people with even insubstantial titles continued for me here in Dubuque. While I was being passed around from one insane-o's living room to the next, as if, really, underneath it all, their need for me didn't far outweigh my need for them as they were. At least a cardboard box doesn't have multiple personalities.

Thx to the entire Roman Catholic infrastructure in this area for making it so undeniably clear why I was led to the strongest spiritual path, with the most potential to lead a globe forward, and away from your miserable, bigoted, fearful, hypocritical ways. Even as I have, without judgment, stepped back into masses on necessary occasions, and lit up the room with always-have-been-there, perfect, exemplary, Catholic values and Light. Don't act as though you can't figure out why you're falling apart from every direction. You're weak, and there are new technologies being merged with ancient pathways to take your place, so don't worry about the rest of us. I'm sure you weren't.

More from the heart of Satya as it becomes important to make sure U know who you're rolling around, soul-deep, with!